Posts tagged with "SouthernStar"



2022 · 27. January 2022
Open road.
We often talk about how we 'have to' do certain things, as if we have no choice. However, the late psychotherapist Sheldon Kopp once said that you are free to do whatever you want; you need only face the consequences. My latest column discusses what Kopp meant and suggests we are more free than we think.
2022 · 13. January 2022
When you’re feeling down, you may feel too tired or listless to do things that might lift your mood. How can you break out of the inactivity trap that is at the heart of depression?
2022 · 03. January 2022
When we encounter something new, we often feel a mixture of curiosity and anxiety. Curious, because newness can be intriguing, exciting; anxious, because newness can also bring uncertainty and risk. This column explores why we often let anxiety win this internal battle, but suggests we should do the opposite: that is, do what you value and follow your curiosity.
2021 · 16. December 2021
Thoughts.
Thoughts are just thoughts, not facts. Unfortunately, we often over-identify and fuse with our thoughts – and that can be a real problem when the thoughts are negative and punitive. For example, you might react to the thought “I’m useless” as if you are really useless, making you feel sad and hopeless. In this column, I give some tips on how to casually defuse from negative thoughts.
2021 · 02. December 2021
Emotional woman.
Sometimes, our emotions cause us to do things that aren’t good for us. However, you don’t have to be a prisoner to your emotions. In this article, I examine the opposite action strategy – that is, do the opposite of what your emotions are telling you to do.
2021 · 18. November 2021
Waiter cafe.
When was the last time you made conversation with a stranger? Does it seem awkward and not worth the bother? Would you be surprised to hear that routinely talking with strangers can make you happier? And yet, the research is clear on this – whether you’re an introvert or an extrovert, striking up brief conversations with strangers is more enjoyable than you think and good for your well-being.
2021 · 04. November 2021
Relaxing on beach with books.
I recently talked about exposure therapy and the importance of facing your fears. But what if you fear the thought of relaxing and being 'too happy'? One way of changing this mindset is by devising what I call emotional exposures. This article explores the aim of these emotional exposures: to drop that guard, to give give yourself permission to hope and be happy.
2021 · 21. October 2021
The best way of overcoming your fears is to confront them. Exposure therapy – exposure and response prevention or ERP, to use the proper name – is a proven psychological treatment for all forms of anxiety, but how exactly does it work?
2021 · 07. October 2021
Woman worrying.
Relaxation is good for all of us. If you’re a worrier, however, you may well find that you actively resist relaxation, instead choosing to continue worrying. Why? My latest column explores research showing that worriers don’t like negative emotional contrasts – for example, when you suddenly go from feeling relaxed or upbeat to feeling stressed or fearful. To avoid this negative emotional shift, you stay on guard and continue to worry.
2021 · 23. September 2021
Clutter.
The word 'clutter' brings to mind the image of a messy house. That's not the only downside of clutter, however, because a physical mess can also mess with your mental health. My latest Southern Star column discusses why we hold onto things we don't need and offers some tips on how to live a clutter-free life.

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